George Bush is going to give an address Monday night and announce the deployment of National Guard troops along the Mexican border.
Mexicans don't scare me. I think the POTUS needs to talk to his brother and deploy National Guard units to control the outbreak of killer alligator attacks plaguing Florida. Especially since I'm headed down there on vacation next weekend. And you know what vacation means? It means a more mobile, and hence more lightly armed Bubs, that's what it means. My family is plucky, but we can't be expected to fight off swarms of killer alligators armed only with a compact Glock 9mm handgun and whatever improvised explosives we can make out of cosmetics, rum and sunscreen.