There's a budding movement out there to document accounts of men behaving like assholes in public places like subways, parks and restaurants, and then post them on the internets, along with cellphone-snapped pictures when available.
It's about time, and I hope this idea really takes off. I'm always stunned at horrendous conduct that too many of my fellow men feel entitled to engage in. Some public shame is in order, and long overdue.
There's a new site, HollaBack CHICAGO that's loosely affiliated with a bunch of other sites doing the same thing.
Give them a visit.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
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8 comments:
thanks for the link those are too cool
Before my wife and I got married, she and her daughter lived near Southport Avenue, in Chicago, which has become one of the big party areas. A couple of St. Patrick's Days ago, she was walking down Southport with her then-8 year old daughter in the afternoon. Some drunken palooka thought it was appropriate to drop trou in front of them. They were glad to move to my neighborhood, which is a little more kid-friendly.
I guess with the "Girls Go Wild" vids, men must figure it's their turn.
Katy, glad to be of service.
Howdy Johnny.
I think, in a way, you're onto something. I think that a lot of guys rationalize their rude/vulgar to-the-point-of-predatory behavior by looking at the slutty antics of girls-gone-wild types and think, game on.
I recently sat through a 3 hour presentation on sexual harassment, and it was fascinating to watch the reactions. The audience was about 97% male, and there were clearly some edgy, worked-up souls in there feeling very, very threatened, terrified they'd get sued for repeating some Seinfeld joke, etc. I suggested a couple simple steps to avoid sexually harassing someone "unintentionally" (since that's what a lot of these guys were saying they were afraid of, "unintentionally" harassing someone):
1) Treat people the way you'd like to be treated, and
2) If you're a male, treat your female coworkers the way you'd want someone to treat your mom, wife, daughter or sister.
Blank stares all around.
It is pretty much non-stop harrassment in our office, but I would feel unloved if it stopped....
It's better than no attention at all, eh?
We are a very close knit group and we all have the same very messed up sense of humour, so it works for us. People walking into the office are usually horrifed.
I think the key to not harassing is if someone is clearly uncomfortable with what you said or did, stop doing it. Anyone is entitled to make a mistake (within reason) but it's the ones who can't take the friggin clue that get themselves into trouble. That, and maybe don't talk about anything sexual or use bad words until you know for sure someone would like it.
Thus sayeth CP.
Good point CP.
The examples of sexual harassment that I've read about, in most cases, rise to or nearly to the level of criminal conduct.
A lot of men seem to have the idea that there are thousands of us out there who've had careers and lives ruined by bullshit harassment claims, and that one wrong joke, look or compliment can set the whole thing in motion.
The stuff that the "can't take a friggin clue" guys that you mentioned actually do--the touching, grabbing, ass-patting, etc, are the kinds of things that, were they done outside the workplace, would result in getting arrested or getting your ass kicked.
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