Wednesday, August 22, 2007

What's new in Iowa?


Iowa is so much more than corn, soybeans and Pork Queens.

I know that some east and west coast elites refer to the midwest as "flyover country." I think they'd be surprised if they understood just how interesting places like Iowa are, if you just put aside your prejudices and get to know the people there.

For instance, in Des Moines Iowa they have deranged, naked, hammer-wielding lesbians going on rampages.

How's that for diversity, east and left coast cultural elites? Huh?

32 year old Satin Delfrano, got pissed off, got naked, got a hammer and went on the attack against several other women, some car windows and ultimately a cop.

Alcohol was involved.

12 comments:

Johnny Yen said...

Ain't love grand?

Splotchy said...

If this is your entry for Weenie-Waver Wednesday, I think you are stretching it a bit, hammer or no hammer.

Frank Sirmarco said...

I think Ally Sheedy could play Satin in the made-for-TV movie...

Joe said...

Frank, oh YEAH...nice.

Splotchy, stay tuned.

Johnny, it's funny. When I sit around having special thoughts about hanging out drinking with a trio of lesbians it NEVER ends like this.

Writeprocrastinator said...

"Pork Queen?"

Wow, no matter what they do, they'll never live that title down...









or live up to it, for that matter.

"32 year old Satin Delfrano, got pissed off, got naked, got a hammer and went on the attack against several other women, some car windows and ultimately a cop."

Somehow, I don't think she was quite what Duke Ellington was thinking when he recorded "Satin Doll."

Frank,

Ally, or this chick

Anonymous said...

I won't be the first to make a joke about lesbians and a well stocked tool belt. I won't, I won't, I won't!

Joe said...

Kirby, but if you WERE going to be the first to make that joke...well?

WP, you've never heard of the Pork Queen? You need to visit! A couple years ago some angry animal rights person hit her with a pie.

And I like your choice for the movie.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Is she a meth freak too?

Doc said...

I've had night when I was PISSED OFF. I've had nights when I went naked. I've had nights when I weilded a hammer. Hell, I've even had nights when alcohol was "involved", but somehow none of these nights involved lesbians, but there was a policeman involved with one of these nights. Take your pick.

Doc

wonderturtle said...

You should write pulp fiction! That sentence beginning "32 year old Satin Delfrano..." (and maybe ending "on the attack" to preserve the suspense) belongs on a paperback cover, for sure.

Dino said...

Satin???? interesting name. well I am sure she wont have any trouble making friends in her new accommodations.

Coaster Punchman said...

As Monkey intimates, Iowa is also the meth capital of the US.