Monday, October 29, 2007

Meet Tiffany Sutton. Happy Halloween!



Just in time for Halloween, 24 year old Tiffany Sutton, of Tempe, Arizona, pled guilty to aggravated assault and was sentenced to 10 years in prison.

And what crime did this sultry, yet disheveled vixen commit?



According to police reports, the victim, 46-year-old Robert McDaniel, agreed to be tied up during sex but became alarmed and asked to be untied when Sutton pulled out a knife and said she liked to drink blood. Sutton then attacked him, slicing his leg, puncturing his arm, shoulder and back and cutting his neck and stomach. When he escaped, she chased him with a pickax.
I found an interesting tidbit in this story from the Arizona Republic (with the wonderful headline "Blood Drinker Gets 10 Years). Sutton claimed that the encounter was consensual:
Sutton told police she made McDaniel sign a book promising not to prosecute her for when the "sex got crazy." "You, Robert McDaniel, swear that no wrong will come to me, Tiffany Lachelle Sutton, due to tonight's events," read the document, provided by the court. "You also pass me all your earthly powers, wealth included."
Drugs and alcohol were involved. The two had smoked methamphetamine, drank a six pack and half a bottle of whiskey.

No word at this time as to the presence of exotic pets in the crime scene.

*Updated on Monday, October 29, 11:10 am

Astute reader Mob points out that Tiffany bears a striking resemblance to the character Marla Singer in the movie Fight Club. I say she looks like the kind of girl who would help you make soap from her mom's liposuction fat, or at least help you steal it from the hospital dumpster:




19 comments:

lulu said...

Tiffany is one of those names, like Wayne. You give your kids those name and you pretty much know that they are going to end up in the police blotter of the local paper

Bubs said...

Lulu, BLESS YOU! I thought that was just me and some of my fellow detectives. It's the theory of the stripper name--you give it to your daughter, you've cursed her.

The Freakonomics blog has several entries on the criminality of guys with the middle name "Wayne"

Dino aka Katy said...

yeah I had read that story and was laughing to myself

Mob said...

She doesn't even look that crazy, your mug shots usually have a more obvious insanity going for them.

Although she does kinda look like Marla Singer from Fight Club and she was nothing but trouble, ratty hair and all.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

I didn't know Ozzy Osborne had a female clone.

Dale said...

She'd fit in just as well in the film Margaret's Museum, a classic starring Marla, I mean Helena B.C.

Beth said...

Vampiric lovin' is a bad thing? Huh.

Grant Miller said...

That's spooky. Her and I both like to drink blood! Small world!

Erik Donald France said...

Ah yea, Marla Singer. There is a resemblance in vampiric aura :->

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I thought she looked familiar. Did you happen to get her address? Because if I ever do go for the lipo, I'll be happy to mail her the goods.

The Idea Of Progress said...

I would also suggest that she resembles Helena Bonham Carter in Sweeny Todd and Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.

lulu said...

Amber, the most strippery name evah.

Bubs said...

Lulu, right! Oddly enough, though, I've never met a stripper named Amber. Jasmine, Porsche, Tiffany, Mercedes, Roxy, Angel, Destiny, Candy...I'm trying to remember the names of some strippers we hung out with in Las Vegas, but I'm drawing a blank now.

TIOP, uh. Yes.

Barbara, she'll only take delivery if you throw in a bottle of fortified wine and a few lines of meth.

Erik, don't let your guard down!

Grant, I thought you looked a little pale the other night...

Beth, drawing a little blood isn't bad, but that's only if you use your nails and teeth. Knives are a no-no.

Dale, I'll have to look for that!

Dr MVM...whew. Now I'm imagining her sounding like Ozzy. Thanks.

Mob, you got to admit though, she does have a certain...quiet intensity. And you're right on about the Marla resemblance! My daughter was reading over my shoulder and let out with a huge "oh my GOD" when she read that, which is why I put up the Helena Bonham Carter pics.

Katy, it's funny because we don't know them.

justacoolcat said...

I'm guessing the alligator got away.

Johnny Yen said...

What some guys will do to get laid...

All I can say is caveat emptor...

lauralu said...

I didn't see that this happened in a trailer park, but somehow I figure that's where she lived.

I bet he was hoping that she was going to suck from some other body part...sorrrrry, I digress.

Bubs said...

Laura, the trailer park was a good guess. I read somewhere she was living in a "shed" behind an unoccupied house.

Johnny, caveat emptor indeed. I would have loved to have seen the look on horny middle-aged guy's face when the knife came out.

kirby said...

I wonder if I can find one of those "crazy sex" waivers over at NOLO.

Writeprocrastinator said...

"I didn't know Ozzy Osborne had a female clone."

My initial impression was similar to Monk Von Monk's, I thought that was the Osbourne sister that somehow managed not to be on the show.

Certainly that R. McDaniel is no Narrator/Tyler Durden.