Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Germany or Florida: dog days edition
Let's get down to business.
It's been a few months, and that's just too darn long. I'll go over the rules for those of you who haven't played before:
-Read each story
-Determine if the story originates in Germany or Florida
-Post your choices in the comments section. I'll post the winners on Friday.
And now, without further ado, Germany or Florida:
1) A man was convicted of sending unsolicited photos of his penis via cell phone to a woman. The investigation did not reveal any reason for the digital gift.
2) Police found a bag of crack cocaine concealed in the folds of belly fat on a 400 pound man.
3) A woman arrested for drunk driving was also cited for not securing her 1 year old child in a car seat. Her beer was safely buckled in, though.
4) Police investigated a domestic disturbance after an angry anti-smoker used a fire extinguisher to put out his girlfriend's cigarette.
5) Two bartenders were convicted for serving at least 44 shots of tequila to a 16 year old boy, leading to his death.
6) This group of soldiers has become flabby and unfit.
7) A woman was accused of sexually assaulting her daughter with a chili pepper after beating her with an iron and and the iron's cord.
8) A police officer was attacked by a group of 50-75 bystanders at a water park when he tried to arrest a teenager.
9) A woman trying to steal cow manure fell into the manure pit and fled the scene. Naked.
10) A woman battered her boyfriend with a toilet seat after she caught him smoking rock cocaine in the bathroom.
11) A 46 year old man was arrested for striking his mother in the head with three pounds of sausage during an argument.
12) A woman called police to her home after her "increasingly intoxicated" friend wouldn't stop talking to her about her personal problems...for 30 hours.
13) A man lost money at a strip club and called police. He was not satisfied with the response, so he called again and asked for different officers to respond. He was arrested.
14) Ten military projectiles and an air-to-ground rocket were discovered on the grounds of a school. Other WWII era munitions have been discovered in the area in the past, and now everyone's wondering how much other unexploded ordinance is buried underneath all the homes that were built in the area.
15) A car thief, attempting to escape police, drove his car into a field and bailed out. He ran into nearby woods in an attempt to escape, but was attacked by wild pigs and captured by police.
16) Police discovered a man sitting in his van, in a wooded area, behaving suspiciously. When he gave permission to search the van, police found a collection of women's sonograms, a blond wig, rope, knives and a machete. And 18 human teeth in a film canister.
17) A man committed a robbery, and as he left the scene accepted a lift from some strangers. The strangers robbed the man, and he reported the theft of his theft proceeds to police, and got himself arrested.