It's now officially snake week at the Compound. Multiple sources, including Reuters, the Guardian and the BBC, all reported that someone released live rattlesnakes at a screening of Snakes on a Plane in Arizona. It's a good story, something right out of the William Castle
Predictably enough, the so-called "authorities" are denying such a thing ever happened. A spokesman for the Phoenix Police Department says no one released snakes in the theater. He goes on to state that one rattlesnake that was found in the lobby "had likely slithered into the theater on his own." WTF? That's supposed to be reassuring? That's right, no one released venomous snakes into the theater, but Phoenix, and the entire state of Arizona for that matter, is so infested with rattlesnakes that they just slither into the theater "on their own" from time to time!?! Get me some Coke and a corn dog, I feel way safer now! No, what they need is some motherf*cking alligators to deal with that motherf*cking snake problem, is what they need.
I take that back. It turns out that, in a fight, a big-ass snake and an alligator are a good match. Remember that picture of the python that died trying to eat an alligator? This story from Salon.com says that the Everglades may be infested by anywhere from 1,000-10,000 Burmese pythons. Turns out that python-owning freaks, once they tire of the thrill of caring for a 12 foot long beast that can kill you, like to dump them into the Everglades.
And, finally, Venezuelan Dr. Jesus Rivas, a noted expert on Anacondas, is willing to take you on tours of the jungle to help hunt snakes. He likes to wade in, barefoot, and poke along with his bare toes to find the elusive green Anaconda. You can visit his website here.