Tuesday, March 10, 2009

It's Green Monkey Music Project Time!

It's come to this: Splotchy has threatened to revoke the prized GMMP monkey-wearing-a-crown logo that you see on the right of this page.

The combination of his flood-induced anxiety and my procrastination seem to have driven him to some angry, dark place. Believe me, on the internet he's all "oh, I'm a happy go lucky, slightly snarky pop culture creative genius" but you should see my emails from him. ALL CAPS, and laced with threats and worse profanity than I've heard in 20 years of law enforcement. I knew I had to do something, quick.

Usually when I'm confronted with a deadline, or any type of crisis, I quickly rise to the occasion, calm, capable and resolute. Every great once in a while, though, I like to mix it up by simply collapsing into a motionless, slack jawed lump of self-doubt and inactivity. This was one of those times. What to do? What kind of mix could I come up with?

My inspiration came from Lent. It struck me: how much of the music we listen to is, if we're being honest, totally reprehensible? In this house, a whole lot of it. I'll explain more in a moment.

Yes, friends, I am rested and ready. It is time to guest-host a Green Monkey Music Project Mix! I have two possible mix names, and I can't decide which to go with. I'll leave it to you, and ultimately to Splotchy, to decide on the title:

Man, you know this shit's not good for you


The Lenten Mix

Here's the dealio: each song you pick has to have something about it that makes you think "uh-oh, could I go to hell for listening to this?" It has to contain enough references to sex, drugs or violence that, even as you enjoy listening to it, you know it's not really good for you...it might even be harming you in some way. I'm talking sleaze. Mind the blasphemy, though. Please.

The mix will be limited to 8 people who will each contribute 5 song choices. Get it? A total of 40 songs, one for each day of Lent. Years from now you'll be able to listen to it and reflect on your sins, doing penance for each song. It'll be a character builder.

Splotchy is in, and I'm in. That leaves 6 lucky commenters a chance to grab a spot, so get to commenting.


Beth said...

I wanna play!!!!!!!!!!! My iPod is filled with decadence.

Bubs said...

Yeah! Beth is in!

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Oh how can I resist? Debauchery is my middle name. Seriously, my parents were really weird.

Count me in, Bubsy!

Doc said...

Chuck Berry's "Down-bound Train" & AC/DC's "Night Prowler", that's all I've got for "going to hell" music.

All of my Ozzy, Dio, and Megadeth have been replaced with The Wiggles after we had kids.

Good luck on the music project Bubs. It sounds like it's gonna be great!


Tenacious S said...

Please, oh, please! Pick me!!!!!

Randal Graves said...

Um, all I've got is blasphemy. Well no, I've got some blood. I'll play.

I always had that Splotchy figured for a rampaging lunatic.

Bubs said...


Barbara, Tenacious S and Randal Graves are in!


BeckEye said...


Bubs said...

BeckEye, you're in!

Apologies, folks, my math skills stink: THERE IS STILL ONE SPOT OPEN!

Go for it, you depraved sonsabitches.

Splotchy said...

This is gonna be bad (in a good way!).

Dena said...

If the spot is still open, I'll take it. The damned spot, I should say, or does that qualify as blasphemy?

lulu said...

damn it, I hate being on the other side of the world! This was opened and closed before I even woke up!

Dena said...

Yo bubs, how soon do you need this mess?

Bubs said...

You just have to pick out the titles and submit them Dena. More soon!

Dena and Lulu, you are both in. I'll post more details shortly.

p0nk said...

same here lulu.

somebody better list Pat Travers' - Snortin' Whiskey, Drinkin' Cocaine.

Tengrain said...

Bubs - I'm sorry I got here so late.

It is a well known fact that I can inflict musical harm on people, and indeed send them to their perdition early with just one of my dirty playlists.

Virgins and nuns have been known to put up a number ticket machine and start charging for dollar knobbers in the parking lot. Republicans have been known to solicit dirty sex in airport bathroom. Senators have been lured into diaper-wearing infantilism fetish play. Who's to blam/thank? And that was just the first playlist on my iPod o' Sin.

Oh well, maybe next time.